I'd like to tell a little of our testimony, about what my husband and I went through, because as difficult as it was, it was worth it. You see, Cardinal Walter Kasper's (see above linked article) proposal about divorced and remarried Catholic couples and receiving the Eucharist got me thinking about how my husband and I were both married before and had fallen away from faith. We both came back to faith, married each other, and eventually came back (and into for the first time) the Catholic Church.
From the moment I became Catholic as a new convert, my husband and I knew, that to continue to receive the Eucharist we'd have to live as brother and sister until we could get annulments and our own marriage convalidated. And we did...for 19 months. According to a statement made by Cardinal Kasper, we are heroic.
“To live together as brother and sister? Of course I have high respect for those who are doing this, but it's a heroic act, and heroism is not for the average Christian.”
Heroic? Well, probably not. God's mercy? Absolutely! In fact, either one of us will tell you that God gave us this amazing strength through the whole thing. Perseverance to keep slogging away at all the paperwork, requests, and contacts we had to procure for the tribunal and the waiting, oh goodness, the waiting to hear back each time we submitted more information. Many times I cried wondering if God would grant us the gift of more children...ever. But I stopped crying one day when my oldest asked me why I was sniffling. I told him I wanted more children, so little 4-year-old David prayed and then said, "Don't worry Mommy, God said you'll have 2 girls." Don't you just love how God speaks through our littlest ones?
I knew we were following the path of Truth. I knew we were doing the right thing. God had given us that Prudence to take up our crosses and follow Him. And we were abundantly blessed in November of 2012 when we received convalidation at a beautiful Mass celebration.
I was also a little thrilled to get to wear a wedding dress again. What can I say, I'm a girl. ;)
Can't resist posting a pic of our handsome fellas from the event as well.
Cardinal Kasper suggests most of us are not meant to be heroic, but as average Christians my husband and I accomplished living as brother and sister, with God's help of course. Can we not do all things through Christ? The cardinal also discusses failed marriages as something that need be confessed. I agree, but the process the tribunal has a divorced person go through is so much more in-depth than confession, more cathartic, if you will. That process is what is truly needed to heal the wounds that so deeply affect all of us who have had that marital intimacy with someone and then tragically lost it.
It has been suggested that the Church be more welcoming of these divorced and remarried Catholics, but I am here to tell you that at no time in my conversion into the Church nor our wait for convalidation did I ever feel unwelcome. What I saw, was a loving parish community that wanted both my husband and me there so much that we had more people attend our convalidation than our initial wedding ceremony! If I felt anything, it was that feeling of a child who is eager to finish his schoolwork so that he may go outside and enjoy a beautiful, sunny day. I could see the joy and I very much wanted to be a part of it.
Do divorced and remarried couples need mercy? Of course, but not by extending the Eucharist to them when not in a state of grace. They need mercy so they can get to that state of grace because the road is long and we can grow weary. The parish at St. Cecilia Catholic church extended that mercy to us as did God. We sought Truth, found Prudence, and were given Mercy. And on that lovely day pictured above, we felt Peace, celebrated Love, and received long awaited Justice. And 10 months later we received our third blessing, a baby girl we named Hannah Rose. She is such a wonderful gift from our Lord and I look forward to many more blessings He may bestow upon us. ;)
